Christian Dating rules

Top 10 Rules of Christian Dating

It is high time churches should start talking about dating. This is because it is difficult for some Christian to keep their relationships and pure faith at the same time. As a Christian, when dating self-control is paramount to uphold the conviction. Relationships always come with a lot of love and fun that when is not handled correctly, then there might be some challenges. With prayers and honesty, the relationship can be holy and wholesome based on respect, love, and trust.

Setting rules for Christian dating could lead to Christian centered marriages. Following the guidelines of dating as Jesus followers can prevent Christians from unhealthy relationships.

1. Effective Communication. 

Through communication, both of you has the opportunity to understand and know more about each other. This will provide an opportunity for both of you to identify if you are a good match. Sharing opinions, beliefs and thought will enable Christians to determine if the relationship has a promising future that can lead to marriage.

2. Dating with the aim of marriage.

As Christians, we should date with a purpose according to the gospel. This means, before deciding on a date someone, you should first consider if the person meets your qualifications of a spouse. This will help you stick in one perfect relationship rather than jumping from relationship to another. Dating without the purpose of a Christian is worthless.

Dating with the aim of marriage does not also tie you to one person even when things are not working out for you. Apart from being Christians, we are also human beings who have needs that should be satisfied. If things are not working out, end the relationship and pray for a befitting partner.

3. Have your fellow Christians around and always ask for advice.

When you are dating, always welcoming advises given to you by your fellow Christians. Do not walk this journey alone. Your feelings can sometimes deceive you and block you from seeing reality. There are some of the problems that your friends could identify that you cannot see.  Failure to listen to people around you can lead to failure in marriages, which something can be prevented. Involving yourself in this discussion creates a positive, wholesome Christian environment.

Also, you can attend the dating groups in your church. Visiting these groups will help us understand how to handle issues of relationship. This will also give both of you a chance to be together more often but in public areas.

4. Have a list of principles and stick to them.

Before getting into a relationship, you need to set your stands and values of your future spouse. You cannot have a successful marriage if you don’t understand what you want as a Christian. The list should help you identify your rightful partner while dating.  It should not act as a checklist but as a reminder of what you want. As a checklist I mean, you don’t go around interviewing people and confirming if they meet your qualifications.

Sticking to your principles does not mean you eliminate others just because they are not qualified. Some people are always willing to change. The heart of holiness and marriage are essential, so it cannot be thrown away just out of frustration and impatience.

Setting your boundaries and making them clear early in dating can also help. Restraining yourself from activities such as sexual relations, kissing, and special touches can help you from getting involved in sexual activities before marriage or if you needed you can try with the free chatlines service to chat all your sexual desires.

5. Don’t date Non-Christians.

The primary purpose of marriage to Christian is to perform the role of recreation and companionship as indicated in the bible. As a Christian, you should date your fellow Christian who understand what dating is and what its main aim is. Dating a non-Christian who doesn’t understand this can lead you into temptations like sex before marriage and others.

There are always difficult times in life when your whole world is crashing, and your faith is wavering, and the only thing you have left is your spouse. In this case, if your spouse is a strong Christian, he or she will pray and encourage you. When your spouse is non-Christian, then you can end up drifting away from God. So, it is advisable that you date a Christian, marry someone who loves Jesus and continue spreading the gospel as missionaries together.

6. Put God at the center of your relationship.

For a successful Christian relationship, you have to put God first. Pray together, read the bible for guidance, attend church and bible studies together. Spend some time reading the guidelines about marriage in the text. Stay pure until marriage and always remember to pray for your partner and thank God for them even if they are not around.

7. Don’t date someone because of the benefits you are receiving from them.

Dating and marriages cannot be successful if it’s based on what a person is giving you. This can include gifts, joy, peace, and purpose. Codependent dating will eventually lead to co-dependent marriage which will fail when there is nothing more to offer.

8. It is okay to get married.

If your desire is to get married, it’s okay because it’s a gift from God. To prove this, God saw Adam alone in the Garden of Eden; He saw that it is not good for a man to be alone and create Eve for marriage and procreation. The relationship is the most intimate community that God created.

9. It is okay not to get married.

Though marriage is a blessing from God, it is not a must if you are not interested. Not getting married is not a sin; hence it is okay if you are not fine with it. Don’t allow yourself to fall a victim of cultural pressure.

10. Have a pure mindset

When you want to date, have an open mind. It is not a guarantee that all Christians are virgins. Having sex before marriage is wrong. I agree with that, but some circumstances lead to that.

In conclusion, dating is a good thing and cording to the Bible, God wants us to find soul mates. When dating, make your partner fill loved by caring for them, spending quality time together talking to each other, learn more about each other and most importantly pray together.

Online Dating for Christians

Should Christians Use Online Dating Sites?

The 21st century ushered in a new phase of Internet Communication Technology (ICT) with its attendant blessings and curses. For instance, innovations in digital technology enhanced person-to-person interactions through websites and electronic gadgets such as Smartphone and tablets which allow phone calls and internet chats. Online dating is, therefore, a collective term for young people and adults, including Christians.

Channels of Online Dating

Though some Christians still have reservations for online dating websites, many princesses are meeting their knights in shining armour each day through online dating channels. The trendiest communication method for people in long-distance relationships is dating apps, which allows installation of chat software on smart phones for cost-effective interactions over the internet.

Websites:

Internet users browsing from laptops or desktop computers can visit online dating communities through the World Wide Web (www). Installations of web browsers such as Internet Explorer or Google Chrome are a prerequisite. An active internet connection is also required. Users have the option of video calling if their computers have inbuilt cameras or connect an external camera through the USB port.

Phones:

One of the primary functions of phones is to enhance communication between two or more persons. This is done through Short Messaging Service (SMS) or Multimedia Messaging Service (MMS). Though both mediums serve the same purpose, SMS allows only texting while MMS permits sending of images and texts. Also, we’re having the option of using Phone chat lines that with a common number connects singles to the same pool. This type of service is called Chat line dating usually singles uses this type of service until their trials expires.

Smartphones and App:

Advancements in ICT enabled installation of digital software on smartphones thereby eliminating the stress of moving about with your computer. Phone applications are similar to software programs installed on computers, but smartphones are preferable because they are handy, easily accessible and capable of handling cloud computing services. Apps do not need web browsers, but an active connection is required to access the functions of most dating websites.

Smartphones have SMS and SMS functions as well as audio and video-calling capabilities. Apps, therefore, bridge the gap between people though there are lots of risks involved.

The debate

Discussions on whether Christians should use online dating have been around for decades. Critics of the dating method argue against it because looking for love online shows a lack of faith in God, who has the divine power to provide partners in His own time. 

On the other hand, supporters of online dating think Christians should have the right to find love online through websites or apps built strictly on the values of Christianity, specifically Christ-centered devotion. For the second group, online dating serves as a tool for bringing people of the same faith together. And countless testimonies of happy marriages started from matchmaking sites. It is therefore considered a fallacy for anyone to categorize Christians using online dating as “good” or “evil.” The question should instead look into what happens next when two people meet online. This brings us to some of the risks involved in online dating.

Should you get involved?

Before registering on a dating website, the first question you should ask is: what’s the purpose? Again, you should ask if it’s worth it.

Online dating brings a mixture of joy and sorrow because marketing yourself to millions of people out there with different temperaments, personalities, and background indicates you are at some risk. Worse still, you are never 100 percent sure that your goals—however genuine—will be met. Media statistics show that a large number of people have ended in body bags after erroneously thinking they had found true love on dating websites. 

Whether you are seeking partners for a casual meeting, one-night stand, lasting relationship or marriage, here are few facts you should know:

a.    There are sex offenders out there:  About 30% of rapists use online dating websites as their primary platform for tricking unsuspecting victims. Some of these sex offenders are not yet on the public registry National Sex Offenders because they have no previous arrest record.

b.    Love scam is real: At least 20 percent of profile names, pictures, and addresses found on dating websites are fake. While some internet users have falling victim to fraudsters who device lies with claims of true love only to dupe unsuspecting individuals. Some of these scammers are daredevils who can visit their victims, get emotional as the need arises and maintain long-term relationships with promises of marriage. On the other hand, there are phishing websites purposely built to steal your credit card information with little or no suspicion from you. Of course, the fact that some real dating websites offer paid services increases the threat.

c.    Online predators abduct and murder for ransom: Online records show that over 20,000 persons are abducted and, in most cases, killed after they exchanged contacts with strangers on dating sites.

d.    Victims lose over $100 million every year: One of the famous love scam stories come from fraudsters who claim to be in love and would love to meet except for problems caused by distance. They eventually ask for flight fare. This highlight the level of trust you should have for online friends until they are proven innocent beyond all reasonable doubts. Unfortunately, the foxy criminals know precisely how to melt a man or women, heart.

Fact check on finding true love online

Beware of this common lie. There’s a 65% probability that people you see on dating websites are married, divorced or in a relationship. Unfortunately, most people would rather lie about their relationship status because the primary purpose of using dating sites is to “use and dump” unsuspecting partners. You have about a 10% chance of finding people who are ready to commit to a long-term relationship.

The bitter truth

According to research conducted by Factual, every 4 out of 5 persons who met on dating websites have unprotected sex on their first date. The painful truth is: people have rights to their bodies and can do whatever to want with it—if it doesn’t infringe on anyone’s freedom or rights. But this is different for Christians who are answerable to God for their personal decisions.

What you can do to stay safe

Using a trusted dating website is the first step to avoiding the risks associated with blind dates. Fortunately, there are over 10,000 websites to choose from, but you certainly need advice and referrals from close friends, family members or colleagues. Other security measures you can take include:

  1. Conducting private investigations on your matches. You can do this by searching Facebook and Google for clues.
  2. Don’t give out your personal information (bank cards, home address, social security, etc.) to online friends for any reason.
  3. Block friends with suspicious characters and report them to customer care. Identified threats will have their accounts deactivated after a review.